SUMMARY

• “A willingness to be open to consistently learning, educating, and developing yourself lends itself to a confidence mindset,”
•  Confident people are authentic and transparent with themselves and others about what their space of expertise is, and what spaces they don’t have competency in.
• “Highly confident people are really clear in their space of capacity and their space of inability, where they are highly capable and where they are incapable.”
• If you’re looking for tips on how to understand and cultivate confidence, this episode is for you.
• Watch the video to get the full training.

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 Full Transcript:

[The following is the full transcript of this episode of Joey’s Performance Tune Up With Joey Klein. Please note that this episode, like all episodes, features Joey speaking unscripted and unedited. This video is captured in one take.]

In this training, we're going to focus on, you know, basically what is the mind doing when we feel confident? What's the mind's, you know, strategy? Or what is the theme playing in the mind when confidence is present? Because there are certain thoughts occurring in the mind, there's a certain mindset that goes along with confidence. So when the mind is thinking in this particular way, confidence is essentially present. And so there are two key things that we tend to focus on as themes when confidence is there. The first thing is there's a belief in ourself and our ability, and that can occur in a few different ways. It can be the past. So we can look at the past and go, wow, I achieved this, or I did that in the past, or remember moments when we were capable or we overcame something, and then we have that basically determine what's going to happen in the present moment relative to where we're going. Because this happened and because I was able to do that, I'm certain that I can fulfill that which I need to do now and essentially repeat what I've already done or have what we've already done, give us permission for what's possible in the future as we move forward. And so reinforcing an essential belief that it's going to happen, even if we don't have evidence there that it is going to occur or we haven't yet achieved the thing that we're after or fulfilled on some inherent capacity or outcome that we want to fulfill on or achieve, the inherent belief that it will happen or having faith in it will tend to fuel confidence and the themes that reinforce that idea. 


The second theme is the theme of capacity. And capacity can be an affirmation of what we know we're capable of because we've already done it, such as a role within your career, like, hey, I know I can do this job because I've already done it successfully for many years. Or, you know, if it's like a sporting event, it's like, hey, I know I can perform well here or do that play because I've practiced it a thousand times over and I've executed it time and time again. But also, we can look at capacity inside of certainty of developing capacity. And so we don't have to have a skill or an ability to be confident in what we're capable of, although it can help for sure. We can also just look at capacity as a capacity we're developing. My capacity to learn. My willingness to educate myself or develop an ability will also lend toward confidence. And achieving a sense of confidence. Hey, I'm confident that I'm willing to learn and do what's required to develop the skill. And so that can be an affirmation of capacity in the same way that we affirm that which we're already able to do and skills we know we've already cultivated. And so if the skill's not there yet, we can have a sense of confidence in the theme of affirming the capacity in which we're committing to develop. 


And so, confident individuals don't know everything, and they're not necessarily highly able in everything that they do, but they are humble, and that humility gives them the ability to acknowledge what they don't know. Confident people are actually the most willing to just simply name where they're lacking in skill and what their inabilities are. And it's combined with a willingness to develop the skill and the capacity to learn, to educate it, to figure it out, to make mistakes along the way until they are capable in the way that they're striving to be capable. And so a lot of times, people make the mistake with this idea of confidence. That confidence has to be married with a high level of capacity in everything. I have to be able to do everything, which just doesn't even make practical sense. The reality is the most confident people that I know or the most confident people you'll ever meet, there's two things that are present. There's a crystal clear clarity in what they know and what they don't know, number one. There's a crystal clear clarity in what they know and what they don't know, number one. And so if they are in a area of their proficiency, a place where they have developed a skill, then they will be confident in the knowing that they have the skill and in their execution. I'll say that again. When we have a high level of confidence, we're clear in our space of competency, and we're willing to simply affirm and understand that we're in our space of competency and execute with a sense of confidence, knowing that we've developed those skills. 


Now, on the other side, individuals who are highly confident are unapologetic and are not concerned with acknowledging when they're not in their space of capacity. Right. They're not in something they know. They're humble in the essence, when they're willing to just go, I'm not sure how to do that, and then assess whether or not they're going to develop the capacity for it or not. And so confident people are actually very authentic and transparent with themselves and other people in the space of where they lack and willing to 100% go, that's not my area of expertise. I'm not sure how to do this. But they're confident in their ability to learn it and their willingness to figure it out if they need to develop that competency and that capacity, and they'll 100% just ask for help and assistance and look for that in the way in which is necessary to fulfill the outcome that they're after. 


And so remember, like, confident people are really clear in their space of capacity and their space of inability, where they are highly capable and where they are incapable. And they don't feel shame, they don't feel guilt. They're unapologetic about owning both of those realities. Hey, I'm really good here. I've developed these skills, and I haven't developed these skills yet. These aren't, this isn't my space of capacity. And then, and then, building that capacity if that's warranted or needed. Now, the second thing that highly confident people do in that dynamic is they are not worried about what other people think. And so when the mind starts going to, well, what is this person gonna think? Am I gonna be embarrassed? Is this person gonna like me? That's going to fuel insecurity and be a confidence killer at the end of the day. And so people that are highly confident orient around themselves, right? So they're actually not arrogant, but actually very humble. And in that humility, they're able to just say, I don't know, when they don't know, and ask for help or other people's opinions, which actually lends toward building a greater sense of capacity, which then fuels higher confidence, because the more capable we are in any given space, the easier it is to feel confident in that space, because we have a certainty that we know how to execute on the thing that we're looking to execute on, whether that's work skills or a sport that we play or knowledge in which we possess or relationship skills and et cetera. 


And so just be aware. Like, the mind is doing these key things when confidence is present. So if we want to train confidence and cultivate a mindset that is going to reinforce and develop a high level of competence inside of confidence, right? The ability to hold confidence in your day to day life, just play with these skills and reinforce these themes in the mind. And even if you're not feeling highly confident right now, you're going to find that it'll develop that sense of confidence, and you'll feel it more and more and more the more you think inside these frameworks. So enjoy. Play around with it and we'll see you next time.